“People keep diaries because they think they are different, because they have a story to tell. Because they hope someone will discover it, and thus discover their true personality.”

I stumbled upon this quote at least a good decade after my grandfather asked me a question. It was December 2004, and a couple hours earlier, I had decided to leave our coastal Gambian resort to take advantage of the early morning peace of the beach. I was 15, and getting some meditative hours as the sun rose was my idea of the perfect escape from Michigan’s winter. I returned to join my grandparents for breakfast, journal in tow, and explained my morning activities to them.

“But why are you journaling? Who is supposed to read it?” Granddad asked. I didn’t have an answer. When it was put in such practical terms like that, well, why was I writing? I was on vacation and I wanted to capture the memories, but I never thought about the actual purpose. Maybe it was for practice? But I was an excellent English student, and I really didn’t need that. Was it in preparation for a future career as an author, or – perhaps unforeseeably – a blogger? I don’t believe anything vocational was really on my mind. So, what was the point of a record no one would ever see? I wasn’t sure. I’m still not, not really.

But what I did know was that back then, when I regularly spent time with myself writing and reflecting, I was okay. And as the years have passed, the journal entries have been fewer and much more far between, and that sense of peace and balance has, regrettably, gotten farther away from me.

I want it, need it back. I have much to release, things to examine and plenty to reflect on. And so I’d like to start again, on a medium that is a bit more likely to be discovered one day, and one that maybe, kindred spirits may connect with.

I’m starting again.

On a Friday night, accompanied by a smooth Spotify playlist and a glass of red wine to quell the intense nerves I’ve had about this for so long, lol. I’ll start because I have something to say… I’m not sure exactly what it is yet, or how well-written it will be, but I’m so anxious to share it. And, if you come across this, no matter your opinion of it, thank you. If you are here, no matter how or why you came to be here, you are so welcome.

Thank you for listening.